Yeah...I did something that I never thought I would. I bought a Kindle. What an amazing invention. I sort of feel like a sell-out because I love books so much. My house if full of them. They are my pleasure, my decoration, my habit, my hobby, my occupation, my time filler, my calming agent, my friends, my food, my recreation, my drug of choice, and more. I guess that is the problem, they are overtaking my home and my classroom. I can't give up the words, but I need to cut down on the physical space they take. I need my fix.
I am amazed at how a book can be mine within minutes of the idea of the book. I hear about it, I look it up and within seconds it is mine. Another part that I'm having trouble with is the way the book gets into the Kindle. Through the air, within seconds, it is there. Magic. To think, as I am moving about...there are words slicing through my body on the way to someone's cell phone, computer or Kindle. These waves of thought which used to only occupy our minds are now occupying our universe. I don't know if it is healthy, but it is our new reality. Thoughts converted to words and communicated to others are vibrating all around us and we aren't even aware of it...or are we? Hmmm....increased incidence of ADHD, adult onset? ADHD, increased rate of diagnosed autism, depression, exhaustion, ...makes you wonder what we will find as far as connections in the future. Only time will tell, I suppose. In the meantime, I'm sucking in those books and enjoying every minute of it...with my blinders on.

What is normal pain?

It is strange that, as I get older I develop more pain. It didn't happen suddenly
but so gradually that it is barely noticed and becomes the normal way of feeling. So, when the doctor asks if I have pain, I say not really. But actually I hurt everywhere...hands, feet, right elbow, back, shoulders, shoulder blades, forearms, calves, ankles, one knee....When I sit still, I throb, and burn and occasionally stab with pain. I'm so used to it...I try to ignore it. Should I be putting up with this pain?...I assume it is the way everyone feels at my age.
My fingers don't look like my fingers anymore. I have lumps and bulges that weren't there before...hard bony bumps that distort the former gracefulness of my hands. They look like old people hands with tiny wrinkles or crinkles all over. Those hands are fighting a good fight to keep supporting my need to schlep stuff. More about schlepping later.
How'm I doing with trying to write more regularly?

Mama Bear

I'm getting ready to hibernate. When the cold weather set in, I basically move into my kitchen. I can turn down the heat in the rest of the house and then the dogs and I are very comfortable using the one room. I started doing this a couple years ago and just love the cosy feeling of hunkering down for the winter. I sit at my table with the dogs in their beds on the floor surrounding the floor grate. I also have a little electric space heater that looks like a wood stove to take the chill off when necessary. I have a little flat screen TV mounted on the wall with DVR. I REALLY love the heating bills...they've almost become dinky! I'm buying stew meat this weekend..another sign of winter.
It's not quite like Laura Ingalls Wilder in The Long Winter, but I like the feeling I get by doing this. Oh, I even moved my Christmas Tree location last year so that I could see it through the kitchen french door. Simply cosy.

Before I began this blog last June, I was so full of things to say. Before I took this plunge, I was so full of ideas. Then, I froze. Apparently, I'm not alone. I read in "The Happiness Project" (Gretchen Rubin) website that this is the norm. We feel that we have to have the perfect topic, or think of the best way to say something...so while we are waiting for inspiration... nothing happens.
Well believe me, a lot has happened since my first 3 posts... too much to catch up on in one small space. But I've decided that from this point on, I'm not going to wait more than 2 days between posts so that I will get over this fear of not being good enough to blog.
In case you stumble upon this post, you may be wondering why I use so many "elipses" ... It is just my style. I stop to think and insert dots. I guess it is like using white space in poetry for me. Maybe I should just use the white space because it doesn't look as cluttered... I'll get back to you on that.

Baking

I don't bake. I love cakes, pies, cookies..all that stuff...too much in fact. So, I don't have it in the house I don't like deprivation, but I'm diabetic.

A little taste here and there isn't so bad, but when it is in the house...well then the slivers start to disappear.
oh... just one more piece
I'll take the edge off here to even it out yeah.

But we are baking! It is HOT here. Summers in Maine get warm but usually cool down at night and are livable. Some people don't even have air conditioners!!!
This is our 4th day of 94 degree weather. It sucks the motivation right out of you. Mine is all dried up.
I soak it in water and place it in front of the air conditioner and that works for awhile..but when I go outside whoosh
looks like an old ginger root.

I'm on a time table here. I've rented a dumpster for 2 weeks so I need to tackle a bit of the house each day...this heat wave is just not fair!

So...do you like the pictures of my dachshunds? Hence, the name Doxie...William is the one in the foreground..I have changed the names to protect the innocent...and black one sulking in the background is Hank...again an alias. I like Swistle's idea of giving different names to make it difficult for everyone to know who you really are... after all, I don't want the Paparazzi banging on my door. They might gasp at all the weeds.

I really like the way my words look in print. Have you ever dreamed of writing a book...or just writing anything (besides what you ate for breakfast) in your journal? I have. My dreams sit on a shelf waiting for me to be brave enough to take them down. Maybe this activity will give me some courage.

So...why have I started this blog? 'cause my brain is always full of stuff and I need an outlet...It's fun to read other peoples' blogs, to see life from their vantage points, so why not share? I want to take a risk and try something new... I'm on vacation and bored. Pick an answer...there is no right or wrong, just possibilities.

What's this all about?

Why are the weeds so hard to attack? I keep looking at them everyday and have done nothing about them. Yes. I wish they didn't exist, but wishing them away doesn't work. I've tried that all my life. It doesn't work.

Really, has it worked for you? I've wished I was taller. I wished I was thinner. I wished I was richer, more motivated, less shy. Nope. Still me.

I know...the all encompassing answer to life's problems is work...But that's so obvious...and where is the magic? I don't want to work. Weeds = work... I don't want to think about it, so it crawls into all my thoughts...like a weed.


I've just started reading a few blogs. Amazing invention.
Did Al Gore invent this, too?

I'm hooked on Swistle . I can't get enough of her wit, humor, realism. So I read blogs instead of attacking weeds in the garden. Next step, start a blog!! That will get rid of those weeds.
Take that!!!
I think I'm becoming an expert on avoidance. More later...will I be able to get anyone to read me?